I am a strong advocate for homeschooling, and I understand parents’ desire to control their children’s educational experiences. However, parents may overlook an essential part of the learning process: the subtle nuances of socialization. This includes aspects like bantering, sarcasm, humor, and keeping up with the collective consciousness of children.
While many parents focus on teaching basic social skills such as sharing, being kind, avoiding name-calling, and teaching respect for personal space, it’s crucial to remember that each generation develops its unique style of interests, entertainment, slang, and interactions.
Over-sheltering children from social media and limited interaction with their peers can have adverse effects. The impact of this can become apparent in social environments like playgrounds or children’s parties. Kids who are out of touch with global happenings, trending topics, or appropriate social behaviors may feel out of place. They might appear polite yet somewhat disconnected, potentially damaging their self-esteem and causing them to think something is wrong with them.
Some might argue that this kind of sheltering could be viewed as a form of child abuse since it fails to prepare children adequately for the real world. This approach might work in a small, forgiving town, but it might not be as effective in diverse urban environments. Children who feel out of place may retreat to the familiarity of their hometown, where they feel more comfortable. While there is comfort in a safe and loving town, wouldn’t it be better for children to be well-prepared to experience different environments and cultures?
If you choose to homeschool, it is critically important to allow your children to interact with other kids. Striking a balance is key. Give them the freedom to make mistakes, face problems, and maybe even get into a bit of trouble. These experiences can equip them with the tools they need to handle life situations as they grow into teenagers and young adults.
While academic excellence and kind, communicative behavior at home are commendable, parents should acknowledge that their children’s experiences with their peers might differ. They may feel alienated and unsure of how to interact appropriately, unable to discern whether another child is joking or serious. Lack of social interaction can lead to social awkwardness.
As parents, many of us have experienced being labeled as dorks, nerds, or weirdos during our own childhoods. This labeling hasn’t changed, and today we understand how the inability to relate to peers can lead to these negative stereotypes. Some parents might unconditionally accept their child’s awkwardness, deny their child’s challenging interactions, or become defensive when presented with feedback. This approach can be disheartening when it comes to raising children.
If our child is struggling in a particular subject, we hire a tutor. If they’re sneezing, we might give them Claritin or a neti pot. And if they’re socially awkward, we should compassionately help them understand, without judgment, how they can improve their social interactions while preserving their authenticity.
I understand the concerns and worries of navigating our challenging world, particularly in the face of pervasive misinformation and undesired narratives. However, it’s essential to let our children spread their wings, even if it means they might stumble a few times. In doing so, they can gain a broader perspective on life beyond their homes or small towns and experience other cultures and interactions with fluidity and enjoyment.